Category: Diary

2016… New Year, New Me!

by http://242blqrze.com, posted in Diary, Lifestyle, More, Uncategorized

ATTENTION: Before You Read this Post CLICK HERE to Watch My New Year, New Me YouTube Video first!

 

Hi Beautiful,

A few months ago I was not excited about the New Year. Gratefully though, I’ve gotten out of the funk and I’m happy to enter 2016!

I did something that I think everyone should do during the last few days of the year… Life Analyzation.

Not just for a day. I spent almost the entire months of November and December going over 2015 in My head, and what I would do differently in 2016.

Here’s My list of 5 New Ways, I’ll be a New Me in 2016:

  • Deepen My Spirituality:

Although I believe in God, and fear him, I want to believe in Him more and trust his promises outlined in his word the bible. I’ve spent a lot of my pass year stressing over things beyond my control, instead of “casting my burdens” on God and allowing him to “sustain me as promised in Psalm 55:22. These things were pulling me away from Him… but he never pulled away from Me. So now, my goal is to draw closer to Him in spirit and truth.

Action Plan: Daily Bible Reading and Regular Prayer

 

  • Exercise Gratitude:

Most of the year I focused on things I wanted that I couldn’t have or didn’t have. One day, I realised I was being ungrateful. While I literally cried, throw tantrums, and plunged myself into depression I was not being grateful for the blessings in my life. I had to catch myself and check myself! I started to thank God for things that seemed so simple in my life, that other people didn’t have such as LIFE (itself), a Job, a Car (I didn’t have to walk or catch the bus), Health and Strength, and the list goes on…

I decided to make myself grateful every day! I even made the word grateful My cell phone look screen, so every time I look at it or pick up my cell phone (which is every minute of the day) I will be reminded to be grateful and its working.

 

 

Action Plan: Make Note of One Thing I’m Grateful for Everyday, and Use the word Grateful when Thanking Someone for Something they’ve done for Me or to Me that I Appreciate.

 

  • Take Care of My Body:

I use to pride myself on being a workaholic. I would get off from shifts at the bank, head to a 7 hour photo shoot, sleep for about 3 hours and wake up the next morning to apply makeup! I lacked sleep, I ate once a day, and stopped taking vitamins. I didn’t take breaks even on vacations from work. I was the chocolate energizer bunny!  However although it didn’t show, because I don’t have any vices such as excessive drinking, smoking or partying. No one knew when my back ached, my mind would not go sleep, or when my body would just crash!

Not happening in 2016!

Action Plan: Eat healthier (even attempt cooking), Join a Gym (hire a personal trainer),  Practice Yoga and Schedule Naps.

 

  • Live Life:

I haven’t taken a trip in 2 years. You may say me either, but its not because I couldn’t, its because I wouldn’t. I was scared…

Scared to spend money on vacation, I wanted to save! Scared to travel alone, I always needed someone to travel, no one was available! Scared to fly, yes… I developed a fear of flying. Which I’m no longer claiming!

So this year I plan to travel 3 times, to 3 different places, and even if I don’t accomplish all… I will change course and plan another trip! I’m going to live life… enjoy the Beaches of the Bahamas, the skylines of New York and the stadiums of Miami.

Apart from that, I will go on dinner dates, dance at upscale clubs and laugh so hard with friends until I cry. Cry, tears of joy.

Action Plan: Schedule 3 Trips on My Vacation Dates (1 Family Island in the Bahamas, 2 International in the USA)

 

  • Love Genuinely:

You may wonder what I mean by this, but hear me out…

I don’t think I loved genuinely or “from the bottom” of my heart in the past year, I was too self consumed.

Of course I love my family, because they’re my family I was born to love them. And of course I loved my boyfriend, because he was my boyfriend and we were in a relationship. And I love my friends, even though I would never tell them. But it all felt so calculated. It didn’t feel as if it flowed freely.

I wouldn’t call some people for days, other times I wouldn’t answer my phone if they called. I didn’t take time to express my love through gifts or words or actions. I loved them, but not the way I should’ve.

I’m working on that now (today is Dec 30th, 2015) and I plan to execute that in 2016. This is probably the realest thing I ever wrote.

So there you have it. My 5 ways to a New Me in 2016. If you notice, none of these have anything to do with savings or money or material things. Thats because I’ve conquered that in 2014 and 2015. I’m good…

I’m working on Me this year… the New Me!

I wish You all a Happy New Year filled with prosperity and purpose and love.

Action Plan: NONE! Just let it flow from the Heart…

 

Xo

Co’La💋

 

 

 

 

 

Flat Chest at it’s Best!

by http://242blqrze.com, posted in Diary

Dear Diary,

I specifically remember this day on a family vacation in Florida, riding to the mall with my parents, my dad’s friends who I called “auntie and uncle” and their daughter, and I declared that when I turned 18 I was going to Cuba to have breast implants. I must have only been about 14 or 15 then.

Honestly though, that was my intention. This was before the Love & Hip Hop Atlanta big booty trend. Breast were in then. I had none, and well… still don’t! Compared to some.

Amazingly though, I’ve grown to love my flat chest more and more as the years went by and here’s why…

I can wear ANYTHING. I’m a fashion girl (but you knew that already) and having flat chest saves me from being restricted from certain gowns and tops because my breast won’t pop out. There isn’t much there to pop out!

I grew even more confidence in my flat chest when I saw Lupita Nyong’o, slayer of the red carpet fashion, wore this custom made light blue Prada gown at the 2014 Oscars. Not only did she work the red carpet, but she also won for Best Supporting Actress for her role in the movie “12 Years A Slave”. Lupita’s dress had a very deep plunge. However despite that she looked like a beautiful chocolate princess or sparkling butterfly! She didn’t look distasteful at all because the low plunge was made for her flat chest.

Oscar Winner Lupita Nyong’o at the 2014 Oscars

This year I attended two of the Miss Bahamas Pageant events wearing two different Bahamian designers. Coincidentally, I ended up wearing 2 dresses with a deep plunge. Or maybe it wasn’t a coincident at all…

It was just a fact, that out of both designer’s collections, those two dresses looked best on me because I’m flat chested. In those two amazing dresses my flat chest were at it’s best!

In POJ Designs by Anthonique Farquharson
In POJ Designs by Anthonique Farquharson
In Herc & Lisa by Cardell McClam & Christopher John

I’m proud of my flat chest now, I love it! And although I have nothing against breast implants or plastic surgery, if I could write a letter to my 15 year old self, I would remind her that she’s beautiful the way she was born and no physical alteration could’ve created a better masterpiece.

Xo

Conesha

Living with Scars…

by http://242blqrze.com, posted in Diary

Dear Diary,

I’m back to Blogging and Vlogging on YouTube, but this time with a brand new DSLR camera that is VERY unforgiving.

In some videos I bare all of My Flaws for my 500+ subscribers to see, including skin discolouration, dark spots and in every video the most obvious flaw of all… a Scar above my lip and right under my nose. You CANNOT miss it!

I’ve had this scar for as long as I could remember, and sometimes I forget it’s there. However, due to my Canon t5i and a recent photo shoot, I was reminder that it is there… permanently.

My scar is a result of a horrible traffic accident I survived when I was about 11/12 years old. I had facial trauma and needed stitches which healed into a scar. Although I always loved looking “Pretty”, at 11/12 years old, I was naive to the reality that my scar may cause girls to tease me and boys not to “like” me. However, I’m now 25 and still will not remove My scar.

Here’s why…

One day I met what Bahamians would call a Jonser, but you’d probably say a Bum or Homeless Man. He looked at me and said , “Your scar. Do not remove it! It gives you character.” I was taken aback. He continued, “You’re still beautiful with it!” As if he read my mind and saw my confidence level dropping. He would never know how much his words mean to me still to this day.

Ever since that day I’ve accepted my scar as…well.. My Scar(insert heart emoticon here). So it surprised me when a photographer completely removed my scar with Photoshop on some recent pictures I took.

Unedited Selfie taken with My Canon Rebel t5i
Unedited Selfie taken with My Canon Rebel t5i

I wasn’t upset, because I didn’t instruct him not to remove My Scar, but I didn’t tell him to remove it either! This reminded me that not everyone has or will accept My Scar… or any scar for that matter. It reminded me that in a world searching for PERFECTION, scars are still forbidden or taboo.

Edited Photo with Scar Removed
Edited Photo with Scar Removed

We as people are still trying to ERASE our scars, instead of trying to EMBRACE our scars and accepting how they contribute to our “Character”. Someone else’s scar may not be physical like mine, and on the outside for the world to see, but they may be just as rigid on the inside.

For anyone who is living with a SCAR, whether its physical or emotional such as Mental Abuse, Self Hate, Insecurities, etc. I just want them to know that it’s okay! And that the sooner they EMBRACE their scar, the sooner they’ll realise how it makes them BEAUTIFUL!

Xo

Conesha

Welcome

Featured by http://242blqrze.com, posted in Diary

Lifestyle Pic

Hello Beautiful!

I wish you could see my face as I type this welcome message for the relaunch of this blog! I’m smiling… BIG! I’m just so happy to restart two of my favourite things: blogging and inspiring you!

If you were following me on my old blog page, www.242blqrze.blogspot.com, then WELCOME to my new page, 242blqrze.com! I wanted to return to you fresh, new and beautiful!

If you’re new to my blogging world, I’m happy you decided to join the party. I created this new site specifically with you in mind.

My goal, for 242BlqRze, is to bring out your inner and enhance your outer beauty; to help you find the beauty in life and to create a community of girlfriends empowering one another to respect and love themselves.

So visit this blog anytime. Let’s talk about Makeup, Fashion, Hair, and DIY Projects. And, if there’s anything personal you want to discuss just drop me a message on the contact page.

My 2015 mantra is, “Stay Beautiful”. Say it with me…“STAY BEAUTIFUL”! Good, you gat it!

So let’s make it a beautiful 2015 as we bloom into Beautiful Black Roses, one blog post at a time.

XO,

Conesha

Open Diary

by http://242blqrze.com, posted in Diary

Diary Pic

Everyday won’t be a good day to blog about, but some days will be awesome! So here’s my OPEN DIARY.

Here’s where I’ll tell you all about the $100 bill I found on the side walk, the flowers I received at work, the scripture that made me cry or the stranger that changed my life.

I don’t know which day it’ll be, but whenever it happens… IF it happens…you’ll be one of the first to know!